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We live in odd times. Thanks to advances in technology, it's never been easier to stay connected with other people. We can manage our social media profiles, say hi to old high school acquaintances and send birthday wishes halfway across the world. We can catch up with distant cousins with a quick scan of their recent status update (spoilers, he's upset the Jay's lost) and conveniently ignore our pals when they're spouting off about something you don't care about. You'd think we lived in a time of unprecedented togetherness and friendship.

Yet somehow, people are lonelier than ever. Social isolation is growing instead of shrinking. While our online lives are active, the human side of the equation isn't there. Status updates and online jokes aren't real friendship. They're false coin, flimsy knock-offs of the real deal.

So how do we grow the friendships we have? How do we nurture those relationships and cultivate them? How, in a very basic sense, do we be a good friend? 

The answer is deceptively simple. Just be there.

It seems obvious, but in our fast-paced modern lives, being there is often the first thing to be sacrificed in a busy schedule. Finding time to actually go somewhere and hang out with someone just seems too primitive and bothersome when you could simply tweet off some well wishes or text a quick hello. But as humans, we're social creatures. Saying hello through a screen isn't the same as actually showing up and spending real time together.

We make it too complicated on ourselves. Too many of us equate friendship with events, with activities. That you have to go out for something together, a celebration, a game, a birthday, and so on. That it isn't enough to just get together for the sake of it, interactions have to be bolted onto some larger event or plan that just so happens to involve seeing each other. That's all well and good, but friends don't need an excuse to see each other. Just being there is enough.

There doesn't need to always be an event to justify getting together for a meal or coffee. Gathering to share each others company is an end all to itself. Getting together is revitalizing for both parties. Often, you don't know how much you needed a visit until you have the chance to open up to a friend and share what's been going on in your lives. 

Being a good friend doesn't just make us happier, it's also part of God's will. The Bible directs Christians to gather together, "let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near” (Hebrews 10:24-25). While at the same time, the Bible also warns us not to become isolated "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)"

Friendship is the foundation of Christian community. Being there for each other in real, practical ways is what makes the Church a support structure and institution and not a building people coincidentally show up to at the same time. Be there for your friends. Be there for your Christian family. It doesn't have to be any more complicated than that.